Single Girl Buys Her Own House (but WHY?)

I decided to buy my own place when I turned 24.

I had always wanted to own my own place, but I had filed that dream away a little column labeled "To Be Done with Your Man".  Single ladies don't buy their own houses.  After all, how could you be sure that the house you picked would suit your future family?  What if you got a man, and then he didn't like your place?  What if your sink broke?  Who would fix it?  No, you waited for a man, and then you get your place. Now get back to the steno pool.

Truthfully, I didn't even know I had these thoughts until I started seriously looking to buy.  And my 24th birthday was the catalyst that brought that on.

24 has always been a sort of milestone for me.  When I was 4, my aunt Diane called to wish me a happy birthday.  As we talked and I colored with m favorite rainbow crayon, she casually asked what I thought I would be doing when I was twenty-four.  I responded that I would be married, have my own house, have a good job, and be fresh out of college.  When the fateful day approached, I realized that I would only be 2/4 on my dreams.  Not exactly good enough for a girl who likes to hit her goals well in advance she can exceed them by the time they come due.

Not gonna lie, I was pretty frustrated about turning 24 and being single. It felt like all my dreams were on hold.

Then I realized it, my dreams weren't on hold because they had to be, they were on hold because I had decided that I couldn't fulfill them myself. I was putting myself into a forced limbo.  And on second thought, I didn't really want a man because I wanted the companionship or the comfort of a relationship.  I wanted a man because I wanted to move forward with my goals and my life, and I had decided I needed a man to do that.  So when I turned 24 with no man and no prospects, I had a choice to make.  I could either wait for a man to come along and make my dreams come true, or I could whip out my big-girl wallet and make them come true for myself.

Naturally, the first option made me gag, so I opted for the second.

I thought for sure there was a logical reason why so few young women buy their own houses.  Perhaps the cost was too prohibitive to do on a single income (yet young families with only one working parent do this all the time...and I don't have the cost of a child!).  Perhaps it just wasn't safe (but that varies by neighborhood).  Or maybe there's a little 1950's man inside us, whispering our ears "Listen, sugarlips, you've got a nice figure, but you need to let a man handle this" (This just in, male news correspondent Jamie Garnet is missing). After discussing finances with my bank,  I knew there was no reason to wait for a man.  Your girl can (learn to) fix a damn sink.

So I started looking.


However, even in this age of enlightened feminism, a single-lady buying her own place turned a few heads.  And by a few, I mean all.  If I had a nickle for every time someone asked "So it is going to be JUST you?", I wouldn't have had to dive into my savings for the down (Not true.  I just wouldn't have had to ask my parents to help with closing).  In the 21st century, the only thing that waits for marriage anymore is property ownership.

I'm not going to pretend it isn't scary.  It is.  It's a huge investment, and I'm doing it alone.   But at the same time, there have been a lot of bonuses to the situation, included the respect I get every time I tell someone that I'm buying a house by myself.  And the fact that I am pretty much the kind of woman talked about in most Destiny's Child/Beyonce songs (yesss).

So Prince Charming, if you're reading this, get yourself a lawyer.  Cuz mama's a property owner now, and she fully intends to protect her assets in case of a divorce.  In the words of the almighty Destiny's Child:

The house I live in, I've bought it
The car I'm driving, I've bought it
I depend on me, I depend on me

All the women who're independent, throw your hands up at me.

This just in:  anyone want to teach me to fix a sink?